less than 24hrs to e end of my last ppr in NYP!! This kinda feeling is nice yet i know i gonna miss NYP for e next 3months...=( Esp when my friends are back in sch and i will only get to see them 3months later...
i will be meeting up with my LO after my ppr and then pw say i can no need to go e briefing just ask my classmate help me take log book but i think i will ask that LO, Mr James Tey, if he say no need to go then i dun intend to go then.. but now i am scared and worried and excited abt where i m attach to.. I hope that i will meet nice ppl and nice work environment cos this is my first time working in a office... But i know whoever i gonna meet have its reason for e meet, still i had a lil wish that things will be good and most impt of all, there's food for me or not my parents need wake up earlier to prepare everyday...=(
on a lighter note. sometimes i feel that i m not good at consoling ppl when they need ppl to console them.. hai.. no matter where he is at, i just want to see him wear a smile and be cheerful all e time
zhen is tickled with love at 10:53:00 AM
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Wednesday, August 26, 2009
hehe one more ppr, 2 more days! jia you yizhen! I think i found e reason why am i not as stressed up this time round(i still am quite stress and emo, dun ask me why cos i want to know why also).. The reason is that i m enjoying e process of studying cos i wont have such chance after this fri and i told myself to do e very best that i can, study throw in everything that i can rmbr in e exam and leave the exam hall.. i know i m a contradicting person.. I'm enjoying this part of my life yet at e same time i want it to be over soon.. yest went to coffee bean to study with the company of darling. its a nice place to study but i dunno why it was kinda noisy yest..=( This can bring up many memories of my sec sch life which i had been reminiscing abt them...
Had been feeling quite unwell since yest.. dizzy spells with a slight headache at e back of my brain and wanting to vomit before i have dinner and this morning.. hopefully i m okay cos i very long never feel like this for more than a day..Now i still can feel it.. want to vomit but never, head feels heavy yet giddy....... when its those slightly one i can endure and carry on with normal life but when it is super unwell i will still try to pretend i m okay just so that i will not get my parents worried..
P.S. Happy belated Birthday to my dearest beloved daddy!=) His love is really my sweetest bliss! heart heart u daddy!
zhen is tickled with love at 11:37:00 AM
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Sunday, August 23, 2009
ARGH! when can body ache not come to me! And i m dumb enough to shoot my own hand with rubber band and its so painful!=( 14 more hrs to one more ppr down! hehehe
zhen is tickled with love at 10:23:00 PM
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Saturday, August 22, 2009
I dislike being home alone!!!
Sat is always like that.. How i wish i dun have exam dun have proj then i can pei mummy go out. Although i dun like shopping its still better than home alone!
Some overdue pics taken during dar's birthday=) Birthday girl with her usual many different funny faces...=X
darling hwee and dar fang... dar fang and dar zhen...
darling hwee, dar fang and dar zhen=P Our individual shots...
Suggested pose of the day...
Best of that day's=)
zhen is tickled with love at 12:01:00 PM
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Thursday, August 20, 2009
修道气质
zhen is tickled with love at 10:28:00 PM
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Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Amidst all the unhappy things that i have seen, i am still very blessed with happy things.. To have the love of my parents is something TOO GREAT to be describe in words...
My sweet daddy went to buy mee siam for me early in the morning because i was carving for it last night!
Sweet things always happen to me, lucky me=)
zhen is tickled with love at 3:58:00 PM
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Monday, August 17, 2009
ARGH! i really cannot understand why my mood swings so badly during exam period... i feel stress, i feel happy, i feel sad, i feel playful, i feel pressurise, i feel like slacking.. the list just goes on.. i just feel a mixture of everything not knowing why i feel so...i know that its just 2 weeks 3 papers and it will be sort of over but this is not motivating me like e previous time. Maybe i really need self discipline. But to be frank.. i did study, really... But i also did slack when i think i m abt to explode... I can study until i want to cry, i can study until i feel so irritated with myself.. Just a weirdo in short...
For now, lets get back to e goals of getting more As...... All the best to all having exam=)
zhen is tickled with love at 11:10:00 AM
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Saturday, August 15, 2009
okay i'm back for e 2nd post cos i wanted to update a lil bit abt my recent life before i go and make friends with my notes...
I have no sch for this week. So mon was national day holiday.. We had TQ in the evening.. I feel guilty that i did not revise my zhu li before gg but then in e end, QD do so i think its time for me to revise my ban dao zhu li again cos i dun really have much confidence as i seldom do..
Tue went back to sch in e morning to do report, actually to slack.. Well, its over so i just feel like skipping that part. Went to NP to meet dar dar, e birthday girl.. We went shopping at clementi for some tibits for picnic. Then we met darling hwee at marina bay. We set off for marina barrage, it was a hot day with HOT stories from darlings. As usual, i have nothing much to share.. Everything abt my life is ordinary but happy. May have unhappy things but i dun like to talk abt unhappy things=) And then we went to orchard central for some walks before they headed for kbox and i headed home=)
Wed i went to darling's house to watch Ice age 3. Poor darling had been sick for 5days... And then we slack around while looking at some photos and some interesting stories from TZ. i still think that what matters most is that ppl cherish the fact that when 2 different families get together RESPECT each other, which is already not simple... And then accompanied him to see doc at my house here for his neck. Then went to ECP with him as he have a BBQ for his team.. Then i went to coffee bean to study while waiting for him.
Thu was studying with him again but then i have not much mood into my infosecurity! though i think investment is disgusting i still like studying it.. But i dun have e time to think abt that, i just need to focus and study=)
Fri went to watch where got ghost with dar and dearie... In e beginning i tot that it was quite disappointing cos it was kinda lame but then in the end it was a good ending.. And the words were motivating.. esp.. do you think that health and happiness is coincidence?
zhen is tickled with love at 12:19:00 PM
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i have some things that has been making me feel why the world has change so much, that i cannot recognise who is not wearing mask, who is. Its okay to wear mask for certain occasion, but if u wear a hyprocritical mask where ever u go, then it makes no meaning.. u're living behind that mask, aren't it painful?
Though difficult times, u can really see how self centered human can be.. Even cloest friend that u used to have this naive tot that u all will be BFF but then during difficult situations, u can really see who are the ones who will stand by u... Sometimes just being there to show ur presence can make ppl feel good, it does not necessarily have to be consolation..
Speaking of words, some ppl just dunno when they sld stop joking.. Joking abt someone has to stop at a limit, how does it feels if u r being joke abt something u cant do anything abt.. the victim also have parents, family, love ones and friends who appreciate them for whom they are. i know it does not make sense for me to care abt what other ppl think. But i cant understand why young adults cannot act like young adults.
Lastly, no matter how u hate ur parents for making u lose whatever thing u have, u need to think back and see who are the ones who nurture u to be whom u r today, how shower u e most unconditional love, who will be e most upset to see u in this state..
i know the things i say here cant let ppl whom should see, see... But i wanna drop down my tots of irritation that i cannot accept how fast human can change... How a mask can change faster than ur eye can blink. I really hope those ppl wake up from their childish-ness, selfish-ness and take time to realise that nothing in this world can compare with ur relationship with ur family. Take a good look at e word FAMILY which means Father Mother I Love You=)
alright, enough of that sad things that i wanted to jot down..
It was nice to still know that i still have my family, my boyfriend and my lovely friends.. The hug from the 2 girls last night was really good.. Though i wanted to hug them for being through those tough times but then i feel e warmth too cos i also had been through those period of selfishness and hyprocritical times.. Its true that its hard to find true friends.. And i m so glad that in all my education institutions i have met great friends who are true.. Some we may not contact now, but u know they are true to u, thats really enough. i cherish whatever i have NOW cos i dunno what the future may be=)
zhen is tickled with love at 11:34:00 AM
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Saturday, August 8, 2009
I went to attend a TZ's son wedding last night at Orchard Parade Hotel.. I was actually quite sian to go cos i was not really invited cos there's only 2 seats but then i was supposed to represent my daddy to go, in the end my mummy injured her hand so i represent her to go.. We had a hard time finding e hotel cos we expect it to be big and thus easy to find but we were wrong cos e sign was not obvious!
The dinner was not fantastic.. Well, its not a vege restaurant so i dun expect much but then e program were entertaining enough or not i will really be SO BORED!
First they want us to have a series of handshake so that we can know more ppl from the ballroom... Our table were not very active cos its kinda weird for guys and girls to do so i guess.. And then dinner commences.. After which we watch video of the couple since young till how they made(the standard ones at wedding), dinner served again but then we had to wait for more than 30mins for our 2nd dish(not so amazing dish).. So some of them were a lil irritated with it considering the place is small and dark and noisy...
Then we watch the proposal video mortage... The girl was e one who woo the guy! Thats interesting! But still e guy who proposed la.. And poor him got tortured in e morning while he was gg to pick his bride... I think this is another common thing that happens.. But well, i think if u get a nice wife is okay.. But dun torture other people's son also la.. The parents see le will heartache de ma..
Then they had this stack of coloured paper which we are required to give them marital advice.. One of them that i find it nice was.. "A man fears a naggy wife, while a woman dislikes a silent husband." And true enough life after marriage is not so happy due to this point. Whatever the woman says before marriage, e man says yes.. Whatever e man does before marriage, e woman accepts.. Problem comes when after marriage, all the yes becomes no, all e accepting before rejection...
Then at last part was that the bride and groom sang "Lian Ai Ping Luu" together and the bride sings really well!
zhen is tickled with love at 10:35:00 PM
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Friday, August 7, 2009
This post will be long as i had lots to say.. u can stop after this paragraph if u wish... I was watching channel u just now and i saw this programme.. Star for a cause..Its a show where celebrities go to those not so fortunate country to be volunteer.. That show really touches me deep into my heart and is like a calling to me.. I wish one day i can do e same, but i dun want to appear on TV.. This time they go to Nepal which was e condition some of the TZs and RCs have describe to us.. There is this "future village" where volunteers can go there to teach the kids to nurture the future.. What motivates and touches me most was that they live in such bad conditions yet they have a BIG dream! One of e kids want to be a doctor when he grows up.. So that he can help the people in e village.. BIG AMBITION with a KIND HEART!=) I teared when i was watching this.. i'm a really emotional girl... i m so fortunate as compared to them but i dun have such big ambition.. sad for myself but then social work is my way of contribution to society. and it can happen in daily lives which i need to learn more=)
Yeah final presentation is over! But still have to do report and i m seriously very lazy to do. plus having grp mates that are not cooperative i guess i will end up doing e whole report myself... sld i do something to e coding or just burn it? i dun even feel like looking at it anymore.. Well, i shall decide according to my mood=x Presentation is over so no use doing anything to it.. The fact remains that it was not a total success presentation..
I am seriously tormented. This afternoon just before my presentation i blew my top at my grp members.. First we meet at 10am and i was late for 20 mins bcos i know they will be late but this time, for the first time, they were on time. So keep rushing me.. still scold my xiao hei. i admit i was just trying to slowly set up cos i am not very willingly to add in function at e eleventh hour. For those in IT will know why.. adding functions 2hrs before FINAL PRESENTATION is so risky. cos error will appear last min and sld only focus on whatever functions u have. I keep telling them to run our whole proj instead but nobody wants to heal my advise. Then just 25mins before our presentation they finally decide to test run.. Problems 1) We left with 2 more SMS to send as its limited quota(we need at least 10) 2) Jumie's login did not turn out as expected(even adding in the final coding she have also have error, thanks to kenneth who solves it cos i also dunno how) 3) Whatever code she give me to integrate was not the final copy(still can tell me e codes she give me missing) 4) Errors keep occuring(alot of error when testing, some familiar some alien to me) 5) Eng keat's functions have problem(his thing just cant run at all due to a very stupid error) 6) xiao hei keep hanging(i force start her again, sorry xiao hei!) ~xiao hei is my laptop
All these errors already make my head very big cos everyone is asking me what to do.. i myself was not sure.. darling was not there to guide me or calm me down.. so i told myself i just need to calm down and recall how errors had been solved previously and make use of google which did help me to recall something.. thank you google search...
Then all point fingers at me, esp my leader... i told them 3 times i didnt change their code at all except e beautifying of UI part which for eng keat one is darling help me de so surely no problem.. Plus i tested alot of times last night.. So i ask them back, where were u all when i was integrating and testing proj? u all got experience integration alone before(somemore i heaven use asp and vb for core module proj before)? and u all think my bf is obligated to help us la?(cos he ask why i never ask my bf to help see-_-) Then wanru say huh u integrate alone ar? Liang zhi say ek u never treat her bf eat lunch still blame them ar... Jumie say okay its nobody's fault, dun blame each other already.. i was thinking want to say its ur fault leh.. u know ur login is so impt u still go enjoy urself without testing ur own function and without giving me ur(kenneth) edited function then u expect magic to happen la. still dare to say i change her code.. i never and i m confident that darling change also okay de wont anyhow change her code so i ask her open then she know she give me wrong copy zzz.
I was really hot lo.. 25mins to presentation so many errors occured and fingers pointing u. well, i'm glad i only need to work with them for 1 sem..
Luckily the time was dragged for abt 30mins and we could buy time to solve errors. LMCB. i cannot imagine at e last min where its already our turn to present, we were still restoring the old copy of proj that i saved last night.. in short what was done from 10am onwards on to waste! what a waste of time!! Through this proj i really can see that.. bcos of their own function we can sacrifice others... i was included cos when i restore old copy i tested my own functions and jumie login only. But what to do... I didnt ask them to add functions..
Now.. during presentation.. Problems also alot which i'm lazy to say anymore and we got shot... Esp the ecommerce part was not inside then Mr cheang ask alot of qns which stunned us and i was trying to cover up whatever i can.. i only can say i did my best to cover up for my team. Mr benedict easier to cheat cos i can hear from his qn what kinda ans he expect=x shh hope he dunno i was lying in e front part..=x As we were rushing against time also cos we overrun by 2hrs le.. Plus they keep asking and saying cewei so got not much time left for me and ek luckily i choose to not be last presenter(sorry for being selfish but my initial tot was that he could wrap up but he ended off quite badly...) My functions i never show all cos i only have 7mins to present + ans their qn and the internet connection was very bad! So they asked me something abt the google map then we then say they trust that e functions are working fine.. But then they didnt give me chance to present finish!!And then they realise that was actually i crush in ek and mine function.. again i told a lie that they are supposed to be connected but then due to time constraint we did not manage to do it but actually it did not come to my mind at all!=x The last part was worst, ek was trying to solve his error when mr benedict says he give him 1 more min to wrap up then he still continue to try to solve! Mr benedict was so angry that he said, dun force me to walk out.. i told him to give us a few more secs which i think did calm him down a lil.. hai.. cannot work i know is really stress and disheartening but then never test the patience of an angry marker is all that i can say...
Well everything is over!=) I was feeling more at eased when Mr benedict says.."u all are not e only grp that has been fire on.. Some of the grps nearly cry. We also never expect that, maybe u all are stress thats why".. definitely stress la!! time to do this proj was not really alot with many quiz and assignment in between.. He also commented that.. if this is a job interview, i will definitely get the job becos i m good in persevering till the end even when difficult qns were thrown onto me and also that eng keat is actually strong technically compared to us but he lack the skill that i have so hopefully when we look for job in future be able to persevere.. Actually to see it differently it just meant that i insist on my view, the nicer word for it is persevere...
alright sorry for the long complaining post but i felt so much better after pouring it out=) thanks for ur time if u read till here=)
zhen is tickled with love at 12:46:00 AM
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Saturday, August 1, 2009
I just want thu 1pm to come asap!
But after thu i shall look forward to 28th aug and it shall last for 2days then i will looking forward for 3months later then 6months later...
Argh.. Holiday is a word that had been deleted from my memory. I dun even rmbr when was e last time i enjoyed myself alot and were smiling like i was the most blissful girl on earth. Well, i m not saying i m not blissful now cos i certainly am! Blessed with love, care and a helping arm to catch me whenever i feel that i will fall. I had been disappearing from e social world for abt 2 weeks and i will do so for another 1 week. At least i can say its less than 1 week=)
Last of all, take care everyone.
Sometimes its really tiring to know that ppl are not sincere and have all sorts of idea to make life worst for others but its also very heartwarming to see ppl who cares alot abt others feeling. This is e REAL WORLD i cannot choose to pretend i dunno or didnt see...
dar fang and dar zhen...
